Thursday, April 25, 2013

Having "The Talk"

I think parents will all agree that one of the scariest parts of being a parent is having "The Talk" with your kids.  It's nerve wracking, embarrassing, and just plain uncomfortable.  You have a couple choice with it, however.  You can choose to let school or friends tell your kids what they need to know or you can bite the bullet and sit down with them and discuss it.  Emily is getting ready to start the "Family Life" unit at school in May and I want to get ahead of it and prepare her beforehand so she knows what our family believes.  Charles and I decided years ago when we made the choice to send the kids to public school that we would be proactive with information.  We have taken the time to teach the girls about creation - God's way - and we spend a lot of time sharing our views of political topics so they'll understand that it's OK to hold a different belief than what's being presented in class. 

So, how do we broach this topic of puberty with our kids?  They won't get into a lot of "sex talk" in 5th grade, but I want to make our expectations clear early.  Here's my ideas on helping your kids stay pure and God-focused through puberty. 

- You have to talk to them about the hard stuff.  You have to talk to them about the changes in their bodies and the hormonal impulses that are starting to emerge.  It's hard and I can honestly say I have no idea what I'm going to say!  It's not something that can be scripted out anyway - your situation will not be the same as mine and vice versa.  However, I do think we have to be honest and open when we talk to them about it. 

- Have clear expectations.  I don't think there's anything wrong with teaching your kids about purity and God's plan for sex.  It's hard in today's world to be "uncool" like that, but it's a wonderful gift you can give your children and their future spouse.  My suggestion to you is know what your expectations are for your kids.  Sit down with your spouse and figure it out together.  You have to be on the same page with this or your kids are going to get mixed signals.  I would also recommend going to the Bible and learning what God's ideas of sex and marriage are.  Some great passages to look at are: Genesis 2:24 and Hebrews 13:4.

- Pray, pray, pray about it!  I am trying to lift this up to God in prayer and encourage you to do the same.  Through Him we can do anything - even get our kids through puberty!

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