Isn't it great? I think this can apply to anyone, not just those of us crazy enough to write. An artist would probably tell you something very similar, with "artsy" stuff instead of the writing references. So, how does this list work when you're a mom? #5 is probably the hardest for me to balance as a parent. Kids notoriously don't care (or notice) if Mommy's in the Zone - they still need to eat, tell you everything going on in their day, and homework doesn't monitor itself. How do I take the time I need to get my work done when I can (the Zone is no respecter of schedules or timelines) and still parent these treasures the Lord has given me?
As I sit here typing this awesome blog article I have been interrupted out of the Zone 3 times by various things: Can Morgan get dressed (yes, they're still in pajamas at noon), Crash! the pencil drawers went flying in the kitchen, and Emily needs to walk her friend home from sleepover. This is my life - enter chaos, noise and destruction! Sometimes I wonder how I get anything coherent down on paper or screen while the children are home and awake.
Today I want to try to share some tips for moms and kids in respecting the Zone. What's resonable for us to expect and what's not? How do we take advantage of that creative spark and take care of our children at the same time? Am I still a good mom?
- Establish Boundaries - I think the most important thing for creative moms is to establish boundaries for themselves and the children. If your children still nap, use naptime to be creative. When the girls were younger I wasn't writing, but if I had been I would have used that time to get some work done. Now that they're in school I do the bulk of my work while they're at school. Unfortunately the Zone rarely wears off by 4 pm, so on those days I have to disengage from the computer so I can engage the kids. Otherwise I get frustrated and annoyed when they interrupt. As the kids get older you can set boundaries with them. For instance, today the girls are home and I am spending some time writing. They are set up playing Barbies downstairs and know to keep the interruptions to a minimum. This way I get a chance to do some work while they have some fun time. I will limit myself to a couple hours so that I get time with them today to do something fun.
- Establish Priorities - What needs to be done each day at home? Sometimes when we're firmly ensconced in the Zone it's easy to forget that dishes need to be done, clothes need to be washed, and our families would like to eat dinner. Isn't it a pain sometimes? I would love to retreat to my little bubble and not come out until I have wrung myself dry! But, that doesn't work when you're a busy mom and wife. Our families have to come first - even when we're solving all the world's ills in print or crafting the next great masterpiece. They matter more than all of that, and they need to know that they're more important to you than your work. It would break my heart if my girls or Charles thought my writing was more important to me than they are. As in everything I am first a daughter of God, then a wife and mother - everything else stacks up after that. There are some days I have to accept I won't be a writer at all. I'll be a wife and mom all day, or spend the day with a friend who needs me. And that's OK. I know my priorities and need to learn to accept where everything belongs.
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